Experiences of grief, loss, heartbreak, rejection and betrayal are part of life. While we cannot always control what happens to us, we can control how we respond. Reaching a point of forgiveness is for you, not for the person or situation that hurt you. St. Augustine reminded us that resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Difficult feelings need to be validated, and over time they also need to be released. If you do not release negative emotions, you will struggle to create a positive reality. 

I have always loved the famous Zen story Two Monks and a Woman:

A senior monk and a junior monk were traveling together, when they came to a river with a strong current. As the monks were preparing to cross, they saw a young woman also attempting to cross. The young woman asked if they could help her. The two monks glanced at one another because they had taken vows to not touch a woman. Then, without a word, the older monk picked up the woman, carried her across the river, placed her gently on the other side, and carried on. The younger monk was speechless. Two hours passed in silence, then three, and finally the younger monk could not contain himself. He blurted out, “We are not permitted to touch women, how could you have carried that woman on your shoulders?” The older monk looked at him and replied, “Brother, I set her down on the other side of the river, why are you still carrying her?”

What are you still carrying that you would like to let go of? I can assist you in this process.